Tuesday is moving day. 

I had the worst day on Tuesday.  Jason called me to tell me the paperwork got delayed because the people handling our paperwork are doing a lousy job and didn’t double-check the signatures on the documents and one was missed so instead of it getting sent out Friday, it got sent out Tuesday, and the paperwork takes a week and Jason’s already quit his job and we were planning on leaving Saturday.  Well now the paperwork won’t be back until probably Tuesday at the earliest so it messes up our plans.  I was feeling a little off that day anyway so the news got me pretty worked up.

I had a physical scheduled for that afternoon and I was stressed about it because when Jason went they gave him a shot and drew blood, and the idea of either of those things being done to me freaked me out, not to mention the unpleasant business of having someone poking and prodding you-know-where.  So I figured a nice bath would help me relax.  I went to turn on the tub and ice-cold water was all that would come out.  Turns out the flame for the water heater had gone out so there was absolutely no hot water.    Now for obvious reasons I was really wanting to take a bath before my physical so I was freaking out because Jason wouldn’t be home in time to fix it and I was so frustrated with the lousy day I was having that I actually cried.  Ugh.  Then I had to call my grandma so she could pick me up and take me to her house so I could shower and then she brought me home.

So then I went to the doctor and as far as I know everything is fine, but I asked for some happy pills since I’ve been really down for quite a while (hence the lack of blog entries and appearances online overall) and some pointers to help improve my mood.  Nothing I didn’t know already really…exercise, yoga or meditation, and no caffeine or sugar.  No problem.  He says it will take a while to notice any improvements but I should see changes by Christmas.  We shall see.

That’s all I have for now I suppose…looks like my not writing lately has caused a drop in my blog traffic.  Sorry kiddos.  I will make more of an effort, I promise.

I’ve been rather busy of late…PACKING and stuff.  We’re planning on moving next weekend.

Holy crap, that sounds soon.

It goes something like this.  Finish up final paperwork for sale of the house in the next few days, see family and whatnot over the weekend, Jason’s last day of work is November 9th, then head out of town the 10th or 11th.  Hopefully everything goes the way it’s supposed to, otherwise we may be a little fucked.

Oh yeah…somewhere in there we are also suing the pain-in-the-ass also known as Jason’s ex-girlfriend and part owner of this house.  That will be a trick, I’m sure.  Stupid bitch promised to pay $1000 toward the balance of the house so we could lower the selling price in order to sell the house more quickly.  Well recently she said she can only come up with maybe $500, and now she’s backed out COMPLETELY and says she has no money to contribute.  The payoff balance is over $5000 more than the offer we accepted so I’m pretty pissed that we have to pay for all that ourselves, which brings me to the lawsuit.  Unfortunately we can only sure her for the  $1000 she originally promised us.  It’s better than nothing…but I’d still like to punch her in the face next time I’ll see her. 

I think that’s about it.  My mom was here for a visit a couple weeks ago and it was nice…nothing too exciting about that.  My sister finally got a job (only because the court told her she had to, I think) and she’s made it there on time every day as far as I know so that’s good.  The in-laws are being quirky as usual…mostly about the big move.  MIL asked us if we’ve found a church to go to when we move there.

Huh?

No.

When we said no she then told us how she’d really like to see us make that one of the top priorities…finding a “church family to share sorrows and joys with.”

o.0

Evidently we must not have appeared very enthusiastic about that idea because she started pressing us about why we don’t seem into that idea blah blah blah and Jason put an end to the conversation finally.  I don’t think he wants to tell his parents he’s leaning much more toward agnosticism than presbyterianism right now and that’s fine but sometimes I think it would be nice if he would just do it and maybe it would put an end to the nagging regarding religion.

Or maybe they would make it their personal mission to “save us” and amp up the campaign.  Who knows.

Okay, enough of that.  If my in-laws ever find my blog, I will be in hot water.  Oh my.

I’m sick again already.  Barely over a week ago I had this nasty stomach virus thing and now I have a cold virus thing.  I’m pretty sure I can attribute that to my germy nephew.  I always get sick after I’m around him.    There’s never a good time to be sick, but it’s exceptionally poor timing right now.  We are leaving early tomorrow for a long weekend in Chicago and I feel like hell.  I should be cleaning the house so it’s nice for when my sister stays here (to babysit my naughty cat) but I am just so weak and tired.  I should also be packing for the trip, and packing things for the big move and whatnot.   I should also be looking for the missing USB cord for my camera.  I have no idea where it could be and my memory card is full and I really don’t want to have to buy another card just to have the Chicago pictures on but if I can’t find it that’s what I am going to have to do.

So…sorry I haven’t read your blogs lately, you people who are reading mine (because chances are, if you’re reading mine, I usually read yours too) …but my absence is due to illness and too much stuff to do.

I only have one thing more to say.   Who stole my damn cord?  I want answers.

This entry will probably be all over the place, because that’s how my mind is today.

For those who haven’t  heard yet, we’ve sold our house!  It’s actually official.  We signed the papers last night and there’s no turning back.  I believe our last day in the house will be October 20th and we will be heading south very early on the 22nd.  We would have just left on the 20th but my mom is coming up from Florida for a week to visit.  Yeah, the timing on all this stuff could have been better.  They wanted the closing to be the 13th but I said absolutely NOT because my mom isn’t even arriving until the 16th and she’s staying with us most of the time.

She can help me pack. 

So yeah.  Weird how it worked out that way.  I had made a joke to my husband about a week ago about my mom coming to visit and the possible sale of our house looming over our heads and I said “Wouldn’t it be funny if we sold the house at the time my mom visits and we’d be on the way south and she’d be on the way here?”  o.0  Haha, funny joke.

So it’s causing me some stress but I’m generally excited of course.  I’m not feeling too rushed because most of the packing has been done for months, and some has been done years ago.  It’s mostly loose ends that are causing the stress.  Calling lots of places, bills, and whatnot.  Jason’s ex is causing some stress too.  Since she and Jason are on the title together she’s part of this whether I likeit or not.  So we asked her if we lowered the price to be able to sell it easier, if she’d contribute $1500 the remaining balance we’d have since lowering the price means taking a loss.  She agree, but only to $1000 so we lowered the price.

She has now backed out on her promise.

We are trying to find out if we have any legal avenues to pursue regarding that since we are already paying $4000 toward the loss and she would only be responsible for $1000, which I think is HUGELY generous on our part.  So she’s put a damper on my excitement.

Another thing that has brought my mood down a bit is my dad.  I called him last night to tell him the news.  I knew it was not going to be easy, and he was drunk so I considered waiting until another time to tell him but I didn’t want him to her it from anywhere else and I figured if he didn’t remember the conversation then it would just be a practice run for me and maybe the second time telling him would be easier.  So I told him and he was upset, and I credit the alcohol for his overly emotional reaction but I still felt miserable about it.  THen he said he had a rough weekend and this was just one more thing…so I asked him what happened over the weekend.  I figured something bothered him since he was pretty much obliterated when I called.  Some of you probably remember that my dad got an OWI toward the beginning of the month because of a hit-and-run accident he was involved in while under the influence.   So his truck was wrecked and he sold his other truck to his mother so he wouldn’t need to turn the plates in and he said we could borrow it if we needed it for anything.  I also knew he’d been driving it sometimes too, much to my grandma’s frustration.  But she’s such a pushover and she likes to look the other way instead of stand up to him and do the right thing so she let him drive it.

So of course he got caught driving it.  You probably wonder how.

He hit a parked car a few blocks from home.  Drunk.

So he got another OWI.

And two days later I tell him I’m moving 2000 miles away.

*guilt*

So today I’m feeling really bummed.  He didn’t try to make me feel guilty but I do anyway.  I told him last night that he really needs to get some help before he hurts himself or someone else.  I told him that he was lucky it was only a parked car (BOTH times) and it could have easily been a child he hit, or someone on a bike, or even Jason and I in an oncoming car.  I’m just so frustrated with him and his reckless behavior and I don’t know what to do to help him.  I need to at least try everything I can so if anything does happen to him, I can at least tell myself I did everything I could.  It’s just so hard.  He knows I’m considering having him placed in a treatment center against his will.  I know I can get enough people to sign the paper to get that done…I just need to get up the nerve to do it.  He told me that’s not what he wants and I told him that I don’t really care what he wants  and if this is what it takes to get through to him, so be it.  I know it won’t work unless he wants it…we’ve been down this road before, but at least he won’t be driving around drunk for a while and will go through detox and all that.  He’s convinced it won’t work since he went before and it didn’t work
but I’m still going to do it, I think.

It’s just so HARD.  Did I say that already?

Then i worry about my sister.  She’s on probation since HER DUI and some conditions of that are no alcohol consumption and remaining home between midnight and 5 am.  I happen to know she’s broken those every day since her hearing.  There are other conditions too, but I don’t know them all.
So she’s a mess, my dad’s a mess, my mom’s coming to visit, and I’m trying to get ready to move 2000 miles away.  It should be a happier time for me, but I’m just really depressed…bogged down with other things.

I’m excited to move, but scared as well.  I’ve been blaming my problems on being stuck here, and what if I move and I have the same problems there?  Being here is like a safety net…one big all-encompassing excuse.   It’s given me a reason to remain unemployed.  I want a job, but at the same time I’m scared to start looking again.    What if I’m just as much of a homebody there as I am here?  Ugh. My head is just too full of thoughts.  I’ve had a headache for the whole day.

Oh, and Jason’s family doesn’t know anything about it being official yet…they just know that it’s likely.  So no obvious comments about moving on my Facebook just yet.  Wait another week for that, please.  Everywhere else is fine….it’s just that my brother-in-law is on my Facebook.  So yeah.
Sorry if this was just one big ramble-fest.  I was hoping it would make my thought clearer but I feel just the same.  Maybe a nice hot bath will help.

Oh, and I’m really pissed that I still can’t find the cord to my camera.   I have pictures I want to post, but can’t until I find it.  Plus I’m sure I will want lots of pictures before I leave.  FFS.

Sorry about the empty promise of pictures of me gracing my blog, but I can’t find the cord for my camera.

Dum de dum.

They will appear as soon as I find it.  Rly.

So I had the flu over the weekend.  Fun stuff.  I had a fever of over 101 degrees F,  achy muscles, an intensely sore lower back, and an annoyingly persistent queasy feeling every time I sat up and most of the time I was lying down.  The back pain was so ba it brought me to tears.  I was extremely dizzy and lightheaded, probably from dehydration.  It was just awful.  Thank goodness it was only for one day.  Yesterday I felt better, but not 100% and today I’d say I’m about 95% better.  Almost there.

Nothing new on my end, really. Someone came to look at the house on Friday and they would like to buy it. I’m trying not to get my hopes up, but I say that every time and I end up doing it anyway and I am always disappointed in the end. It’s exhausting.

Went to Backbone State Park last Saturday and did some hiking. I think I’ve been there before years ago but I obviously didn’t remember it at ALL. It was awesome. Really great hiking trails, and I thoroughly enjoyed myself despite the slight hangover I had from the previous night’s antics. I’ll upload pictures either later today or tomorrow and post them. Of the park, though, NOT of Friday night’s partying expedition.

If you’re wondering where I’ve been lately, I’d like to say I’ve been lurking. Yessir. Not in much of a social mood (waiting for news on the house always makes me a bit touchy) so I just spy on things, and I must say, you guys have been boring lately. If NONE of us have lives, how are we supposed to entertain each other? *poke*

We were supposed to go on a little vacation this weekend but Jason couldn’t get Friday off so we aren’t going anywhere now. Bah. We’re just going to head up to thecabin and do some end-of-the-season work up there before it gets too cold. It’s getting cold already…had hot tea with breakfast instead of iced tea, and I’m wandering around in SOCKS. I haven’t opened the windows all day, I read my book under a blanket, and still thought it was chilly. Yay Iowa.

Since this blog is super-boring, (sorry) I will tell you some interesting random things as I think of them.

○ I’m wearing socks that don’t match…they don’t even remotely match. They are two different patterns and colors, and neither one has the match so I figured what the hell.

○ I have literally NO jeans that fit. I know I should go buy new ones, but I don’t want to. I figure I’ll put it off until I know whether or not this latest house deal will go through.

○ I can think of at least eight different things I should be doing that are more important than writing a blog, but I don’t care.

○ Whenever I move to Florida, I’m thinking of buying one of those little motorized scooters so I can actually go somewhere sometimes. LOL. I would also buy some sort of weapon and pepper spray, just in case.

○ My dad got an OWI last week. Had I mentioned that yet? I can’t remember. Yeah. Now he and my sister have something else to bond over.

○ I was looking at sites that have linked to this blog and saw that postworthy.com is listed but I went there and couldn’t figure out how exactly that was so.
○ If you ever want lots of hits on your blog, just write an entry that has the words “drunk” and “beach” in there somewhere. Simple. “Drag queens” is also an effective phrase.

Alright, that’s it. I’ll post pictures from Backbone either today or tomorrow, I swear. Probably tomorrow.

…but someone has to do it. That’s the case with what I did regarding my dishwasher today. Lately my dishwasher hasn’t been getting dishes clean…they are, in fact, always dirtier when I open it up at the end of the cycle. There’s this cloudy stuff all over them and sometimes this icky gritty stuff too. EW. So I sprayed it all with vinegar and got out the rubber gloves and a knife, stuck my head in there, and scraped all the buildup out of it. Another EW. We’ve tried certain products to get it to go away but nothing seems to work. So…if you had this problem and know how to fix it, PLEASE tell me how to make it better. I use Cascade Complete detergent now, (“Our BEST Cascade!”) but it doesn’t help. I’ve been thinking of trying Electrasol tabs next.

Okay, on to more interesting things.

When my parents divorced, there was this bedroom set that they had since I was small and my sister had some of it in her room and I had some of it in mine, and my parents had part of it in their room for a while. Well, my dad wanted the long dresser with the mirror so he got it, and my sister and I each got a dresser and a headboard, since we were still using them in our rooms. My dad called me wanting to know if he could trade me a different dresser for the dresser that goes with the set, and he made a comment about wishing he knew where the headboard and footboard were. I told him I had the headboard until 2 days before, but I sold it at the garage sale, which my mom said she was fine with. He was PISSED. Swearing at me and making rude comments and saying things like “We had that since you were a BABY” and making me feel really badly about selling it. It had been sitting in our shed for 6 year, unused (it’s for a twin bed) so I got rid of it. The irony was not lost on me that I had it for 6 years and 2 days after I sold it my dad said he wanted it. So turns out the dresser he thought I had is not the dresser I have, because there was a small dresser and a large one. He had totally forgotten about the large one and I told him my sister had the small one but she recently sold all her possessions (better that than get a goddamn job, I guess) and she probably sold that too. My dad called her a bitch and went off on her for a while, like he did to me when I first told him about the headboard.

Here’s the best (worst?) part:

He only wants the dresser so he can sell the whole set together and get more money. Here I was, feeling bad because he said my parents had gotten it when I was a baby and I thought he was being all sentimental, but he just wanted more money. I don’t really want to give him the dresser now, especially since the one he’d trade me for it probably isn’t nearly as nice as the one I have now. I was actually just thinking of getting rid of it anyway, so I might offer to sell it to him but that’s it. I’m pissed that he made me feel like an unsentimental bitch for selling a fucking headboard when all he wanted was more cash for alcohol.

Yes, he was drunk when he called me.

Apparently he doesn’t think his pancreatitis scare last year is something that should be taken seriously anymore.

He’s just…a disaster. Like my sister. They are both behaving like idiots and can’t see that there are people here who want to help them, but they both go out and get drunk and act stupid and screw around with drugs and pity themselves instead. They whine about how their lives suck, but don’t do anything to change the situation.

I’m also a bit mad at my sister, obviously. I heard she ran off to Arkansas with some guy for a week. She didn’t tell anyone and didn’t contact anyone and my dad and I tried like hell to track her down and finally my dad did and she just casually mentions her little trip like it’s no big thing. Mind you, my sister has been unemployed since February and also got a DUI in February. She mooches off everyone and does whatever she can to get by without working but still manages to buy a case of beer and a pack of smokes when necessary, which is about every few days. Instead of staying here and trying to get a job, she disappears. I’m mostly mad because she owes me money and has since February and she’s only trying half-ass to get a job so we will stop bothering her about finding a job. It just pisses me off that she feels she has the right to blow off her obligation to pay me back my money so she can go out and do whatever. I’ve done everything I can to help her and she just doesn’t want help so I’m washing my hands of her for now.

UGH.

I’ve finally got my house back in order after moving all the furniture around and getting rid of some furniture and shampooing the carpet and rearranging the furniture…and I’m so glad it’s done. Now all I need is someone to come look at our house and BUY IT. FFS. I’m tired of waiting.

A year or two ago, when I started packing things up that we don’t really use so they’d be ready to go when we move, I started getting rid of things I didn’t really want.  I did pretty well, I think…but somehow I’ve ended up with more stuff.  Where did this stuff come from?  Well, I know where some of it came from…when my mom started going through her stuff, she gave me a few things.  They’re mostly decorative-type things, like something you’d hang on a wall.  They have no real sentimental value…my mom bought most of this stuff at various stores in town…nothing special.  I want to get rid of some of them, but I can’t.  WHY???  Why is it so hard?  I hate having clutter in my living space so I don’t have too many knick-knack-y things around, but I just can’t seem to part with them.  I don’t understand and it’s so damn frustrating.  Gah.  I know I should just bite the bullet and do it, but I’m worried I’ll want it when it’s gone.  If it’s gone, I can have my own style eventually, instead of stuff I inherited from my mom that even she didn’t want anymore.

I suppose I should get back to attempting to get rid of stuff.   Ha.

No confessions this weekend…I behaved pretty well.  It was a busy weekend nevertheless.  Friday was spent shampooing carpets and moving furniture and whatnot.  Fun stuff.  Saturday was spent at the in-laws.  We were there ALL DAY.  From 7 a.m. until after 9 p.m.  We ran their garage sale for them.  And it made me grumpy.  We got there a bit later than we’d planned but when we got there the in-laws hadn’t done anything to get ready for the sale.  They were inside screwing around with stuff and FIL was sort of pissy because we were evidently supposed to call before arriving.  I don’t recall any of that conversation, you can be sure.  So, whatever.  We start setting up and some people come to browse.  Yay, right?  Maybe if it wasn’t 7:30 and the sale had started…but it wasn’t supposed to start until 8.  Bah.  We let them look anyway while we set up around them.  I sat out there ALL DAY manning the sale, except for a short break Jason gave me where he was alone so I felt sorta bad.  I was left alone often while the in-laws hung out inside.    But I got a nice tan and free lunch and dinner.  We ended selling about $70 worth of stuff, but had to give $3 back because the cash box was short $9.  So the in-laws put back $3, we had to put back $3, and my BIL had to put back $3.  I thought this was lame and so did my mom when I told her about it.  But whatever.

Most of today has been spent moving furniture and cleaning more carpets and the couch.  We got a couch from my mom years ago and we haven’t used it yet…it had been in the spare bedroom.  Well, we sold our other couch so we hauled this one out.  We were cleaning it out and found various things, such as nail clippers, TWO remote controls, a paint stirring stick, mascara,  one girl’s sock, and one guy’s sock.  And of course the usual myriad of pens and pencils.  o.0  I was also busy going through some things we don’t ever use or really need and am trying to make our collection of junk as small as possible before we move.  Whenever that is.  Anyway, that’s about it.  Nothing exciting, or even mildly interesting.  It was one blah weekend.